It's been awhile since I've participated in a blogfest, so I've decided to jump back in and participate in the Let's Talk blogfest, hosted by Roni Griffin at Fiction Groupie.
Below is an excerpt from AGAIN, my YA paranormal. Enjoy!
[Excerpt has been removed to protect my work.]
Posts
2 weeks ago
19 comments:
Oh. He has a girlfriend. The conversation sounded real and flowed well. We'll have to work on that girlfriend thing though. Owen was too helpful at distracting the MC from her problems. LOL!
Great conversation dealing with pertinent issues that teens face today.
The fact that he has a girlfriend at the end really wants me to keep reading to see what happens!
Great conversation, Amy Jo. I liked how Emma's mind went right to her own problems as Owen spoke. Weaving internal thoughts with external dialog makes the whole exchange sound authentic. Well done!
This is great. I know I ribbed you before on the Luke and Owen thing, but that only makes it more real because I can see both the brothers on the sand. I loved the banter back and forth between Emma and Owen, and of course the angst that is so there! Great job.
oooh now i really want to play some volleyball!
But not get smacked in the head. No thanks.
Great job Amy! This is so fun. I loved the getting hit in the head with the volleyball :) FUN!
I like the ease with which they talk to each other and his caring about her problems. The smack in the head is so 'boy' and so funny. Nicely done.
I like the sense of a connection between them, particularly since the "he has a girlfriend" moment undercuts it nicely.
Enjoyed your excerpt, in fact, I'd wish the interaction between the two had lasted longer. :)
Thanks for participating!
This is such a sweet moment. Love the tension of friends, wish-it-was-more between them.
Very sweet! Sounds to me like Owen may be ready to move on from his girlfriend...
ooooh...LOVE TRIANGLE! Nicely done.
Interesting. The characters are fun and yet have a depth at the same time.
Brings me back to my volleball days, though never saw too much damage from getting hit in the head. Well, on broken nose (not me) from getting hit by a ball spiked down. Though it can be mind fogging to get hit in the head. I was hit a few times at one set of games and oh my gosh. So hard to keep playing.
But I digress. Great entry for the blogfest.
This is sweet! I wish Owen wasn't taken. :( But I really like this, your dialogue reads very nicely. :)
These two were so good together! Just how attached is Owen to his girlfriend? ;-)
Sweet scene - I really like Owen.
)= Well written-- sad content. She feels the impending doom of her world about to fall apart.
Well done.
The two characters really came across in this post. I felt like I was there, experiencing teen summer camp.
You develop both characters well with this snippet of dialogue, on top of showing their relationship with each other and how it's growing. Nothing like a common situation to strengthen friendship.
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